I’ve had a boyfriend, I thought I loved him before we even started dating. I liked this guy for 3 years, 3 fucking years of my life. We dated after he went through two of my friends; I didn’t care about that though. We were together for 7 months, I ended things because I felt trapped and like I was ruining him, I would ignore him for days and yet he would still say he loved me; it confused me. I broke up with him and then a week later I went and slept with his friend, how fucked up is that? I wanted to cause myself a form of self-destruction, I had no control over myself; I hated myself. I wanted a reason to destroy myself further, a reason why people shouldn’t like me. Do you know what it’s like to hate every inch of yourself? I wanted out of my body and my mind. I’m over him now and I hope he’s alright, if he reads this I’m sorry.