One minute I’m so happy I believe if I jump off a bridge I could fly but every other minute that consumes my life I feel nothing, like I could disappear and no one would notice. These feelings constrict my desire for all aspects of life, it’s highly confusing and rather frustrating.
Right now I’m in the later mood, I know that if I were to suddenly die people would care but I also don’t believe that statement; it may make no sense to you but it is perfectly clear to me. It’s like when you’re given all the facts yet you still don’t understand where these facts came from, to you there is no proof.
The mixture of these feelings are overwhelming as they swirl around my mind; I will probably struggle with this for the rest of my life but I refuse to give up. The one thing keeping me alive is my stubbornness, I don’t lose and I promise that I won’t lose this fight.